Thanks to all otaku-sempai who helped point out these lessons.
Be grateful for insulated walls, privacy, affordable meat and comfy beds.
Arbitrary literary-genre distinctions are meaningless.
Modern North-American popular attitudes toward gender and sexual orientation are parochial and obsolete.
Men are NOT all attracted to the same thing in women!
There's no accounting for taste.
People will take any excuse to party.
Generation X is alive and well and learning Japanese.
Japanese fem-bots dress better than today's teenagers.
It just doesn't pay to be a faceless minion.
For women: It's fine to wear skimpy clothing
as long as you can kick butt.
For men: It's fine to look like a girl
as long as you can kick butt.
Copyright laws do not always serve the best interests of the creators, writers or production companies. (And the smart ones know it, use it, and are making a lot of money!)
Gai-jin just wanna have fun!
Some of the best artists alive today are painting cels in Japan.
The minimum number of VCR's one needs is three ... two to make a copy of something while watching something else on the third.
Bells and whistles on your A/V equipment matter when you're showing 14th gen copies to a few dozen of your closest friends.
There is a use for extended warranties.
There are an infinite number of alternate universes, each with its own version of Tenchi Muyo.
Sooner or later, everyone ends up stranded on a desert island.
"Domo","baka","yosh!", and "omae wa mo shinderu" are useful expressions.
Despite decades of unceasing effort, some things still just don't translate!
Some songs are better if you don't know the words.
A dialogue-free scene with identical background music can actually be funnier in the sub than the dub. It is not logical, but it is often so.
Everyone needs a hobby. Many need a life.
When you see Harlock's flag, yield the Right of Way.
I really need a giant robot.
They also love men with nice hair and cute bottoms.
Men love cute cuddly little moppets.
Cuteness is a force to be reckoned with.
The line between Kowai and Kawaii is razor thin.
There are just as many shows in Japan trying to sell merchandise as there are in America.
It's scary, but the same marketing that is aimed at eight-to-fourteen year old girls also seems to work well for middle-aged businessmen.
People will love you for who you are ... as long as you're secretly a super-hero.
The single greatest indicator of a man's fighting prowess is the bushiness of his eyebrows.
If you can't have bushy eyebrows, razor-thin ones are the next best thing.
It is possible to have warm cuddly feelings toward huge mechanical killing-machines.
There is no such thing as power without cost.
People will love you for who you are ... as long as you're a super-hero or control a giant robot.
If you have to have your soul ripped from you and "eaten" by a three eyed monster, becoming unkillable afterwards is a nice bonus. Especially if she's cute.
The problem with being unkillable is that you'll likely
end up having opportunity to use that power ... often.
("Domo Arigatou" to Craig
Bradshaw for this one.)
There is nothing impractical about having high-heels on your power-armor.
Blade Runner had more impact than I ever thought.
Mirage Knights rule.
The average native English-speaker can usually learn the Japanese for, "You are already dead," in 4 episodes or less.
Despite widespread public belief that it couldn't be done, Golden Nippon has proven they can create worse subtitling than Arctic Animation.
Giant Robo rules!
I really do need a giant robot.
There are really good and thoroughly bad people on each side in all wars.
Wars suck!
Don't insult Madoka-san online!
Real pirates wear pink tights.
Listen to your best friend.
Wars suck!
It is possible for an ink blot to be more of a man than I am.
It is possible for a female ink blot to be more of a man than I am.
Don't take everything so damned seriously.
Don't take anything so damned seriously.
I really don't need a giant robot!
There is nothing unmanly about turning down a challenge. In fact, it's often the only smart thing to do.
Be Nice. Don't Do Anything Stupid.
Shut Up.
("Domo Arigatou" & "Omedetou Gozaimasu"
to my little brother Kyle for this one.)
With proper attention and care, the most cliché story premise in the world can be awe-inspiring.
The angle of the "camera shot" can be as much a part of the joke, tragedy, or climax as the action or drama itself.
Nothing is sillier than human relationships.
Nothing is more truly horrifying than the limits of human behavior.
Things only get weirder the longer they go on.
Always tell the truth!
Despite what we often hear, Americans are not overly concerned with outward appearances. In fact, we're rank amateurs.
You haven't experienced the full cofusion of modern gender relations until you've heard an angry group of women yelling, "We want tentacles!" at an all-night Hentai-fest.
I really do need SVHS.
| Sempai.org | Tonbo's Anime Page | Last updated: 3/14/00 |
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If you discover any of the links on my pages have stopped working,
please let me know. If you have learned any important lessons from
anime other than those I have listed here, please send them to me
for review at tonbo@sempai.org
If I agree, I will add your words of wisdom to this list.