Bride of Ranma

A Ranma ½ spamfic by Tonbo

     The four fiancees sat on the floor of the Tendo living room, fuming!
     Akane began with, "I should have known something like this would happen if you went off to some fancy private academy!  But a Junior High School girl!?  Honestly, Ranma, that's too hentai even for you!  Why do you always do things like this?"
     "I didn't do nothin'!  This upperclassman took one look at me when I was a girl, and started hittin' on me, sayin' all this stuff about 'another beautiful prince' or somthin'.  So I challenged him to a duel to make him lay off."
     "But, where does this new hussy come into the story?" asked Kodachi, indicating the demure female who seemed to have permanently affixed herself to Ranma's side.
     All four girls glared at the too young foreigner in the too cute fuku with the *WAY* too short skirt.  She had been hovering around Ranma since he had brought her home with him on this, his first vacation break from the new school he had recently been transferred to.  She radiated such domesticity as to eclipse even Kasumi, yet something in her submissive manner suggested a hint of subtle eroticism which was entirely the opposite of the older Tendo sister.
     They all hated her instantly.
     "Well, I still don't understand it all, but it seems she was engaged to that guy I beat."
     "And now, she's engaged to you." snapped Akane.
     "Uh, well, actually—"
     "Hey quiet girl!" called Shampoo, "What you do this for?  Why you dump boy you with?  Was too weak?"
     For the first time since their arrival, the dark-skinned girl with the long purple hair pinned tightly up into a single curl around her head spoke.  "I belong to the Champion of the Duel.  Only Ranma-sama may do with me as he pleases."
     At the words, "do with me as he pleases," all four girls facefaulted.
     "RAANMAAA...!" began Akane as she started to raise a clenched fist.
     The sudden way the stranger flinched at this display of imminent violence spoke volumes to the four rivals.  Even Akane was startled out of her fury by the sight of someone who was obviously far too accustomed to being hurt.
     Quickly, Ranma cried out, "I didn't do nothin'!  Honest!  She don't know what she's talkin' about!"  Then he turned to his new acquaintence.  "And please!  I asked ya to stop callin' me that."
     "But we are engaged, Ranma-sama."
     "I never agreed to this 'engagement' or whatever you call it!"
     "But, Ranma-sama, you have already fought seven times in Duels because of it."
     "You've what!?" cried the other four in unison.
     "It's kind'a weird," Ranma rushed to explain.  "Some people at the new school keep challenging me to duels."
     "With her as the prize?" responded Kodachi.  "In this day and age?  How positively barbaric."
     "Is not right use woman as property.  Is *man's* place!"
     "Why not just let yourself lose, Ranchan?"
     "Lose?  You kiddin'?  Those guys ain't no match for me!"
     "Ranma no baka!" yelled Akane, stomping out of the room.
     The newcomer visibly relaxed.
     "Does she know about your curse?" asked Ukyou.
     The girl at Ranma's side lowered her head slightly, and said in a quiet voice, "I know all about curses."
     "Stupid quiet girl no can fight for self?  Need others to do fighting for, instead?  How can husband love weak girl like that?"
     "I never said I loved no one!" protested Ranma.
     "I hate to say this, Ranchan, but it looks like you really got stuck with a lemon this time."  Despite her irritation, Ukyou was surprised to find herself feeling just the slightest bit protective of this new rival.  "Well, you're here now.  What's your name, anyway?"
     "My name is Himemiya Anthy.  I am the Rose Bride, and I am Ranma-sama's flower."

-= THE END =-

-= =-


     Yeesh!  As if I have *ever* wanted to write a "Ranma gets yet another fiancee" story!  All I can do is blame this on my friend, Catnip-kun.  He has this amazingly annoying ability to plant ideas in my head that just won't let go!
     And no, I will not be continuing this.  This is spam.  I just wrote this because C-kun said, "You do realize, don't you, that it's only a matter of time until someone writes the first Ranma/Utena crossover."
     Besides, that show creeps me out too much for me to write in that universe.  I loved it, but by the end, I felt like I was trapped inside The Screwtape Letters and couldn't get out!


     "Saotome Ranma!  I challenge you!"
     Kuno stood in the middle of the street, his boken pointed squarely at the object of his enmity.
     Anthy took one wide-eyed look at the Blue Thunder of Furinken High, then turned to her fiancee and made the closest thing to an assertive statement he had ever heard pass from her lips.
     "Please, PROMISE you'll win."
     Ranma cracked his knuckles with anticipation.  "You better just hope you don't end up engaged to a pig someday."

-= =-


Please send me any type of C&C.
Tonbo <>
finished 10/13/98
revised 02/11/02